How do you make that sound? It's not quite a raspberry but kind of a raspberry whew combo?

     Well it's been quite a year, two months and eleven days.....or 437 days......got my 5 or so tubes of paint out and dragged the big canvas out from behind the couch and made me a picture so hopefully I can change my direction a bit back towards where I want it to be.  I like my picture, it's blue and red (limited colors lol), nobody else does but that's ok....ok I lie....Carolee says she does but she's just nice and I can always force a child to like it.  Childhood family folk never say anything, I think they just cringe and say "OMG she's doing something DIFFERENT.....stop her, stop her quick".   You think I jest?  I've been banned for the posting of a cute picture of two people having fun....omg.  Ever feel like you're stuck in a Martha Stewart world?  Anyway.........

......it's funny how I feel like I can talk about stuff now but don't really want to. Maybe I'll give it a whirl....like the HUGE concrete pad in the backyard.  Really?  Ok, I refer to the thing as the Mega shed project or the Launchpad.........whatever you call it it ain't coming out so I've been trying to figure out exactly what to do with it.......It's huge, no idea how big exactly but big enough for a largest possible shed, a greenhouse, and a hot tub "structure".......and it's visibly crooked.  I mean really....who goes into a project of such magnitude and expense WITHOUT A PLAN????   Whatever, I now am the possessor of such a treasure.  I know how much fill is in there because I put it there, I know how much re-bar and concrete are in there because I wrote the checks.....and I know it would cost more to take it out....so, cool bbq?  fire pit?  gazebo?  planter box garden?  all of the above?  What does it matter lol, the whole yard has gone to pot....heehee, I said gone to pot.  Ironically that is the one thing I don't have to worry about it going to anymore.  Next year, next year I'll get on the yard.  Maybe this year.......nah.  This year I'll aim for some semblance of not needing a herd of goats to get it back under control. 

     I finally got into the subbing thing around Christmas time last year and that'll do for now, actually got hired for a job in february of last year but with the way things were with the schools and budgets they just let all temporary positions go to make room for permanent people shuffling around.   So, back on the sub list I go.  It's not a job one does for the pay lol....took a 20-25% paycut this year over last year, no benefits and no stability......but it has an awesome schedule.  I like the work for the most part and once I get it figured out and go get my masters I can at least sub at a higher level lol.  I wanted to write lyrics for Under the Boardwalk except make it Back on the Sub List a while ago, never did.  Maybe I will tonight.  Off topic here, but one thing I like about life now is that I can buy and actually listen to music now.....which I'm doing now : D . 

     Kids......hmmmm....who knows how they're doing.  I've given the girls an excellent education in what not to do with their lives.  I worry about Anna becoming too hard, I worry about Isaac being too sensitive, Jake is a survivor....he may wreak havoc elswhere but he'll be fine.  I worry about Katie the least, hopefully she'll avoid the pitfalls.......but if she doesn't she'll be ok.  She reminds me a lot of me, she'll sit back figure it out and move on. 

     I wish I didn't have to do all the self protective measures, I wish things could just be logical and sane, but I guess they aren't going to be.  Things are going to be expletives and threats and all I can do is know the legalities and stay within those boundaries and all should be fine.  And I hope he's with his current long enough to transfer all of his stuff onto her lol.......poor woman.  Anyway.