Wow....how’d I go there?

Posted Date: : Jul 14, 2008 11:24 PM

  

Today was the first day of the pigfest….I mean County Fair.  In defense though there are a lot of pigs there.  Grandpa brought Anna and Katie out there this morning and I managed to get there with the other four there by 9:30 am.  Anna did her showing thing, her pigs apparently stink, but Anna did ok.  It was the judging of the animal day and face it, if your  pig don't have good hams, your pig don't have good hams.  I can relate as I don't have good hams either….though my bacon is fine.  So me and the four wandered around the fair afterwards til about 2:45 then went home.  Tomorrow I need to have all six out there by 7:00.  The only benefit of having to be there so early is that there's no one at the gate to pay….muahaha….I don't feel bad though because after 4 days I think they should pay me to come back in.  I swear the kids and I have seen Professor Bamboozle's show at least 30 times over the years.  Somehow I ended up telling the kids I'd give them each $20 to spend as they see fit, I never would have done that with just my own but the other two don't understand not going on rides.  Doesn't make sense does it?  Actually I figure it makes perfect sense….that's why some utility is frequently shut off lol.  I just can't, seriously, I can't hand over the cash……..I mean really WTH….$4 to go in a circle (take the $4 and multiply by 6……um no).  I'm not stingy or cheap really because I have no problem giving them the $20, but to stand there and fork it over myself hurts.  Really.  At least this way I don't have to be the mean one humming and hawing

Ok, this is five days later…….computer went freaky on me when I was writing the above so I just gave up.  Ironically it started back spacing on everything but the back space key itself has never worked, The One Who Mustn't be Mentioned says it's something in the computer, I say it's the keyboard because it's done it since we bought it and the old one never had that problem.  Seems to me we could have returned it right away and tried another one out, but noooooo.   So now we have no backspace ability. Se la vie.  Anna showed her pig again on Friday and did an awesome job of it, and I don't say that lightly….she really did.  The auction was Saturday night and Molly I think went for $560, not as good as years past but still decent for a 12 yo.  Besides the pig had lame hams. 

I've got Junior over here for awhile, his mom's trying to have a baby…soon, soon.  He's a sweetheart though he freaks Isaac out a bit.  Um…..Dorkbutt filed an "injured spouse claim".  Idiot.  Though I'm actually glad he did because now I can move forward un-impeded with this need to be fair to the moron.  The one who mustn't be mentioned says I/we should take legal measures to actually get what he owes and should have been paying all these years.  Crap.  I do have all the paper work though, just a pain in the butt.  Why couldn't he have just been happy taking advantage of us?  Why does he persist in being  the perpetual victim?  Ack…best thing I ever did was divorce him.  I feel sorry for Connie though.  Anyway, the only thing I can think of that would have been an injury to him is that he didn't ask for a modification when he got fired from yet another good job and kept having the same child support but that was only a difference of $35 a month, hardly worth arguing 4 years later.  He's so stupid…you know how stupid he is?  A month or so ago he comes to get the girls and is all manly and puffed up and going to get his way and make me obey.  So he says "you  need to come get the girls on Sunday because the price of gas is killing me and you need to do something to help me out because I'm poor and you sit on your butt all day and do nothing"  or something of that ilk, so I say "ok, we just paid $1020 for the girls down payment on their braces you can pay your half then" and he goes "sputter sputter I don't have $500" I say "I know, that's why we're not making you pay it" and he goes "but you have to help me and pick up the girls".  I have no problem getting the girls from somewhere if it's hard for him to do it but he's talking the price of gas and how it's breaking him…..um….I know he's no good at math but honestly…..$4 once or twice a month shouldn't break the bank…give up a slurpee or something.  He doesn't seem to have any comprehension of the money paid that he is supposed to be paying, I would think if someone isn't pursuing you for $500 that you would let the $4 slide.  $4 that isn't even their responsibility to begin with.  You know…back when we got divorced I, the one with the kids who made $900 a month, sat in the lawyers office and through my own stupidity said he, the one who makes $2000 can't afford to pay $471 a month in child support, and to bring it down to $350.  Which they did.  May not sound like much but since then that adds up to almost $12,000  that I left in his stupid little wallet.  Add to that the loan we split for which he has neglected to pay his half for the past 4 years or so at about a gift from us amount of around $7200.  Then throw in such things as the half he's supposed to pay for any medical/dental/optical stuff that we have never asked him for and it all adds up to MAJOR DORK.  All he has done for the past 7-8 years is gripe that he can't claim one of the girls on his taxes, the cs amounts are set with the criteria that the custodial parent claims the kids, besides the fact that WHY SHOULD I LET HIM?  I don't exactly owe him anything.  Unless you ask him…..he'd say he should have the house….he only let me have it because I had the girls.  Besides the fact that I STILL HAVE THE GIRLS and he's just too incapable to be able to buy a house on his own…..someone has to fill out the paperwork you know, the house was a fair deal…..I could have taken half of his Pers at about $7500, the house had no equity…we could have sold the house had nothing for it and I could have taken half his retirement account instead.  Is it my fault he kept all of his retirement,  cashed  it out and now has nothing?   Nope.  If you ask him exactly how I have "screwed him over" he won't be able to come up with anything.  Just whiny, "I'm too stupid to be able to manage my life crap, poor little me".    So anyway, let him file his injured spouse claim and when it's over I'm though cutting him any slack for being stupid……. I'm getting to be good at bitchy I think.

[Edit] [Delete] [View Comments]

Subject : Sandwich bread and flowers

Posted Date: : Jul 8, 2008 9:40 AM

It's Tuesday, day whatever of I don't know how many days til school starts up.  I don't mind the kids being around; it's just that it's the first year in a long time where all kids will be gone all day.  OMG.  Summer's actually trucking along pretty nicely, no obnoxious weather, kids are decent, and life is good.  I picked my first official yard bouquet on Sunday, it's daisies, poppies and lavender.  It has only taken me 10-ish years to get stuff planted to pick….and life is good……and it's a very pretty bouquet to boot.  Thinking ahead to lunchtime, which I rarely do before breakfast if ever, I realized I had nothing normal to give them.  I guess I frequently don't but that's another story.  Anyway I actually got some bread going in the bread machine.  A white bread, said it was perfect for sandwiches.  We'll see.  I've yet to make a bread that was the wonderful homemade   sandwich type bread.  Winco used to sell farm bread and it was just totally awesome but they stopped.  Probably because it was too good.  It competed with the sales of the nasty Wonder stuff.   At any rate my little machine is chugging away over there for me. 

 

Dorkbutt got deployed…..you'd think he would be happy about it lol…..but I don't think he is.  Probably because now he can't complain about how much the one who mustn't be mentioned makes because he'll make the same…..ha.  Ha ha.   It's only six months though.  My brother is going to be nearby, across a border but close, maybe they can get together.  Maybe not lol.  Maybe I should go check on breakfast?

OS - Pasteurized processed cheese food substitute......

 Pasteurized Processed Cheese Food Substitute........

Posted Date: : Jul 8, 2008 8:32 AM

.......what is it and should we be eating it?  Have you ever given it much thought?  I have...since I was a wee child....pasteurized processed cheese food substitute and orange juice drink.  In breaking it down it's pretty obvious, pasteurized - heated to a degree of deadness knocking out all enzymatic action, processed - put through the culinary wringer, cheese - I like cheese, food - food is good, you eat it.  So far so good, we're ate dead wrung out cheese food.  It's still in a food category.......but then they throw in substitute?  What is a food substitute?  There's some toy cheese over at the church nursery that most of the kids have tried to eat.  Is that what it is?  It looks real, even feels real, it could definitely work as a cheese substitute but I wouldn't want to eat it.  Think about it next time you're confronted with pasteurized processed cheese food substitute........same thing when you're confronted with a glass of orange juice drink....the orange drink that has nothing to do with the juice of oranges.  I could ask what is it?  But I won't.  I'll just put them both on the shelf with  Gold 'n' Soft, Wonder Bread, Twinkies and that Supersize Me guys french fries.  Maybe in a decade or three someone will need a snack. 

OS - On a happier note

  On a happier note

Posted Date: : Jun 30, 2008 8:42 AM

My husband is a jackass, I'm not.  That makes me happy.  So, I just got the oatmeal going for the kids, my own and Danielle and Erin.  Katie is a camp all week which is good because she doesn't like oatmeal.  They all wanted to play with the crap box so I said sure and while getting the scissors out of the scissor vase it got dropped and broken.....dangit.  I added it to my pile of broken pottery I've got going on the counter, fix or toss fix or toss?  It's the old fish or cut bait dilemma.  I'm thinking of making a broken pottery album in my pics.  I had all the kids listen to me explain why I have the right to be grumpy and agree with me.  Now that that's established we can move on.  Anna is going to a friends house at 1 today for a few hours, I probably will have to get gas...hmmmm.  How far will $4 get me lmao.  I've given myself 50 miles a week of driving and that should cover about what I do.  I'm sure I'm in the crazy minority but I like the gas prices.....life is too mundane if you never have to think about it, besides people spend so much more a gallon on coffee and water so what's the big deal?  My opinion.  Of course I don't drive very far.  I need to go to Roth's, they've got cheap cantalope and yogurt through Tuesday.  I bought 6 cantalopes and 18 yogurts last week and they were gone by saturday.  I do love the crap box....Erin is making a robot face, Danielle a robot, Isaac a robot face, Jacob an I don't know, and Anna a cat toy.   Oh...Jake's making a cat toy too.  Jake's having a tough time of it right now and Anna said Jake keeps having fits just to have fits.......the genetics are strong in that one.  Toodles til later.

  Bras have bows so we don’t wear them inside out

Posted Date: : Jun 26, 2008 11:20 AM

I really think it's true, I use that little bow as a guide quite often.  Now the one I don't get is the tassle, there is a Queen Latifah line of under garments, did you know that?  Queen Latifah bras and panties......anyway I have two brassieres, a pink one and a black one, and they have this little dangly tassle....I feel so queenly......and it just tickles.  I don't get it but I'll let it slide.......though it was obviously designed by someone who doesn't wear bras.  Bows are enough in my opinion.  Without them I would frequently be wearing my bra inside out I think. 

OS - 18 years later

18 years later

Posted Date: : Jun 25, 2008 10:21 AM

I got a phone call oh, about 45 minutes ago from this fellow I met when I was 19.  He hadn't called for a few years because he left his phone on the roof of his car and drove off and lost it and had to go to Egypt to dig through old papers to find it again.  Um.  That's all, just um.  The reason I bring this up is because I'm wondering what is up with me that I would run far and fast from the guy who thinks I'm just so wonderfully perfect that I could never do any wrong and marry twice to men who think I need to prove myself worthy to be in their presence?  Maybe it was too scary up on the pedestal, it would be a long fall I guess.  He brought me a pineapple once....I like pineapple.  Back on my 23rd or 24th birthday he sent me this huge bouquet of flowers and hubby at the time....Dorkbutt, not the One Who Mustn't Be Mentioned.....didn't even notice, or rather figured I bought them myself.  Yup...bought myself mongo flowers.   I guess I know where to go if I ever feel like sitting on a pedestal.
Anna and Katie both have their mouth gear in place now, Anna just has normal braces but Katie has an expander thing in that will widen her mouth and make room for all her teeth.  I have to crank her head every morning which isn't as fun as it sounds, at first I was all this is ok, but now I'm afraid of breaking her.  She doesn't seem to mind much though, says it just hurts for a minute then goes numb.  Alrighty.
I explained to Isaac this morning what balls were, but not Jake.  Need to fix that lol.  "You stepped on my balls"  "what balls, I don't see any balls".  I just say why?  How?  and don't.  Now I must shower and go get grapes and cantaloupe.  and sugar.  sweet sweet sugar.

OS - Correction to the fat and dancing blogs sort of

  Correction to fat and dancing blogs sort of

Posted Date: : Jun 13, 2008 9:47 AM

So I blogged about being fat and most recently about me not dancing.  I was wrong, not about being fat, but about the non-dancing part.  I don't dance in public venues, this is true, but I used to dance ALOT at home.  I just realized   this morning, that for about the past year I've hardly listened to any music and I definitely haven't been dancing........ and that my friends is why I am fat.   Yes, it must be. 
My birthday is on monday....whoop whoop.  I was wanting to go to the beach but I've settled on going to the park and having a picnic, if anyone wants to go they're welcome ( Becca, Rebeka, Rachel, Shannon, Carolee???????) (and anyone else but I don't know anyone else that well but if you want to you can come so it might be weird but thats ok).  Maybe I'll get a clown.  I like even birthdays better than uneven ones.  it seems wrong to be 37, 38 sounds ok but 37 sounds incomplete or something.  Maybe it's some sort of number feng shui.  I guess I'll deal for a year.  My cousin spent a year thinking she was a year older than she was, what a b-day present to be given an  extra year.  Unless it puts you back on to an  awkward number.  hmmm.  I'll think on that. 
I need to plant my planter out front.  I'm thinking of putting strawberries in them.  Then I need to figure out how to keep the cat from jumping up into the window one.  Hmmmm.......I'll think on that too.  Good Lord.....I'm listening to Slightly Stoopid and it's all mellow and then track seven comes on and you're all WTH........then you pick yourself up off the floor and go skip to eight.  Why do they do that?  Making a point or something?  "Hey guys.....know what would be really cool? fwoooooo......let's like scare the crap out of people  halfway through this thing."   Maybe I'm just old.  "Turn that noise down, that isn't music...real music has a rythym.  Whippersnapper."  I'm going to go take a shower, I coconut oiled my hair 2 days ago and I have this candy bar smelling thing still going on.  Oh, we went and got our cholesterol checked last weekend....it was so romantic........mine rocks.  It's all the cheese, eggs, bacon, and coconut oil.  Ok, genetics may play a part in it too.  buh bye. 

OS - I don't dance

    I don’t dance

Posted Date: : Jun 8, 2008 1:31 AM

I don't, not I can't, but I don't.  You know how you go to bed and you're really tired and you're making those hhhhuuuuuccchhhh sounds but you just can't go to sleep?  You're lying there with thoughts just circling around in your head and just can't shake them?  Well that's me tonight.  I keep going over the lack of dance in my life and what's up with the Zyrtec commercials.  What is up with them, all they talk about is how taking Zyrtec for allergies gives you time, so much time you don't have when you use Claritin.  Like two hours you gain by using Zyrtec over Claritin because it starts working two hours quicker.  That's about the only aspect they push so I guess on all other levels it's about the same.  My problem with it all is that I use Claritin and love the way it works like in 10 minutes, so according to the commercial if I were to use Zyrtec instead of Claritin I would gain like an hour and 50 minutes.  Right?  According to them if I take a Claritin at 6 pm and it takes 10 minutes to kick in that I would have been allergy free at 4:10 pm if I had taken a Zyrtec.  Right?  So, a full hour and 50 minutes before I take the pill I would have been feeling the effects.  Cool.  Now the question that really bugs me.....what if you intend to take the Zyrtec at 6 pm but since you are already feeling the effects of this wonder pill at 4:10 you forget to actually take it?  Is there a sort of Zyrtec Mob that will come demand a payback?  Are you indebted to the next pill you take and lose all the hours of "free" relief you received against the next dose?  How does it work?  I think I'll just stick with Claritin.  Now where was I?  Oh....I don't dance.  Not I can't dance because I'm sure if someone stuck a gun to my head and demanded that I dance that I could pull off some sort of Jim Carrey/Damon Wayons parody of dance, but as far as intentionally going somewhere on purpose and moving my body to the rythym of the beat?  I just don't happen....yeah sure I can dance to Johnny Cash in the kitchen but that doesn't count.  Yes I have always been like this, I hated the hokey pokey, I all but refused to grow like a little flower, my Mom signed me up for dance class when I was about 10 and the only thing I remember about it was hating it intensely and begging my way out of going to the last class.  My Mom didn't make me go which means I must have done some really good begging.  Well, skip a bunch of stuff because now I'm getting tired, but just remember I will make a scene if you try and make me dance at a wedding or anywhere else. I will.  Wanna know another thing I don't do?  Public speaking, nope won't do it.  Maybe I just don't have anything to say.  Nah.  I got lots to say.   And on that note, this is Fanny Chanal bidding you adieu.